vaneigem's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chew on some flowers Dear god things are great, life is great, the kids are great, my loving family is great, barf barf. well, shit. it's more cool than great but where can you go when you live in a shoe. I never understood that saying, really, to live in a shoe, I mean, well I understand it, but really. Uh... art shit is retarded. The hardest thing about planning an event is not the event itself but dealing with the incompetent people who manage to weasle their way into it and seem to fuck it all up somehow. Actually i'm being dramatic-- it's going alrightand I have a meeting on Thursday about that. Paul D. can go kiss my ass. But also, that iscan be part of the best part. Becuase Chelsea just saved my fucking life and provided me with the best fucking idea in the world. Because I was freaking out because NO ONE HAS EASLES. i thought itw as spelt eisles but i guess im a retard. But I am going to amke fuckin pillars!!!! and SUSPENSION. and .... BUILDING STUFF. i'ts going to be more work but it's going to look a lot cooler and more creative. I am learning that putting on an art show is afucking piece of art work in itself. Learning a lot though! Which was the whole point of this. "Boys are retarded." We all have stories proving why "Boys are retarded." Yeah. Whatever. I know a few boys that rule a million times more than most girls I know so I dont really buy that crap. The losers want us to believe it and excuse it. It's " laguna beach feminism."
I think as i grow more experienced with relationships i dont let cynicism get to me, i just get a bit more cautious. m. is really being weird lately and i tried to talk to him about why he never ever comes out. All he does is stay at home it seems, or work. It's not healthy at all. And hes going to regret it when hes 40 wishing he actualyl had fun in his early 20s. Im kinda worried he has a problem, and it annoys me that he tries to make it into a label that people can place on him: "Hey everyone! I'm the guy who is a hermit!" How romantic- not. it's LAME! and boring. He says, " just think... when I do come out, it will be the event of the year!" Oh well la dee da. I should probably just mind my own fucking business, but sometimes it just really annoys me. Maybe because I just find it a very selfish motive, and I feel he isn't appreciative of his friends that actually want to spend some time with him. If he keeps behaving this way, he's going to turn around and realize he doesn't have any anymore. Wow, it sounds like I am in a bad mood but I am in a good mood. Geoff adn I might be going to mtl for a week now. I am really excited for it. He wants to work there while we visit, but I just really want to have a nice vacation with him. Otherwise, it's just like it is now except we're in MTL. The main point of it is to spend some time with each other, see the city, see some friends, and just relax and have fun. Vacation!!! No stress. Granted he can get a free apartment if he does work so i'm considering it as a fairly good idea, it makes logical sense. Otherwise I would probably be pretty weirded out. I was initially really weirded out in my mind, but now that my brain working, it makes sense. So hopefully that happens and I hope that AA apartment isn't a.... for lack of a better term.... cum dumpster. Becuase if we're staying for a week, I"ll study there for a bit... acutally, maybe I'll study at McGill. WHATEVER. It will be fun> iwant to go to this really cool restaurant that marek told me about back in the day. Um.. I'm going to bed now. I am getting really creeped out by online communities. I am this close to deleting my facebook, it is just really creepy. Creepy overly-nostalgic people from high school, old bosses, sisters friends, friends of friends, family, boyfriends djs girlfriends friends friends of friends that knew my cousin's dog's mom's cousin; it's all an intrusion. I dont care about keeping in touch with 70% of those people. People want to rack up the friend-numbers so they can facilitate superficial, quantitative friendships. Barf . Geoff and I went to the distillery district today and it was cool. We walked tere and that made it cooler and more adventurishy. I was pretty disappointed by the stores and galleries, the few that existed. It's such a cool scenic place, though. I'll suggest to go back at night in the summer; that would be nice. Maybe a sunday night, after a day at the st. lawrence. Geoff is being really fucking funny. We were on the subway and he was eating a chocolate bar totally carefree, smirking and making jokes in this totally crowded subway-car full of stressed out businessyish people. and i just looked at him and realized why i love him so. He is a flower in a sea of weeds! We even make enduring shitty situations fun. Alright bed time. xxooxo 2:35 am - 03.21.07 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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