vaneigem's Diaryland Diary

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GABBA GABBA GABBA

so, hi now.
i just got back from a long day of work, and since it's pretty much been my entire day, i have a few things to get off my chest. so i'd like to send out a few short notes to various people that i work with.

dear JAMES
you are a sweetheart and don't you change a thing, little soldier. i like your shoulders. you are my favourite and i want to pinch your cheeks 24/7. you hate lana. my mom teaches you. you tell me about how she makes you feel godo when your posters are ugly. i'm sure they're very attractive.

dear TERESA
all business, all business, and it's quite respectable, really. i always said that yr like a teddy bear- behind all those claws and fangs, there's a sweet, soft... thing inside there.

dear DEANNA
god im sorry deanna, but everyone hates you. i feel really sorry for you sometimes, and then at other times i think to myself "i now understand why everyone hates you," and then i feel better. and do you hate me or what? one minute yr a total bitch to everyone, second minute, yr all sweet. make up yr fucking mind, fuck lady. you need to chill and smile more.

dear LANA
i think james is going to kill you. stop taking fucking 30 minutes on yr 10 minutebreaks. you can't milk your wrinkley oldness to that extent so quit pushing it.

dear TERISA
you are cool! and nice. and nice to me. i like you. good for you. let's go to atlantis and hit on texans.

dear DANIELLE
girl you need to COMM-UN-I-CATE. communicate. you need to tell me if those coordinates are done, if those face-outs got scamped, etc, or else you'll fuck up the whole compliance. god you are a sweetheart, and so quiet, but save that quietness out of necessary job things pls.

dear KEVIN
you really do nothing all day. it's kind of funny. in fear of condoning these actions, i'm not really into you telling your boyfriend that you are going toroonto with me to cover up yr love affair there. follow your heart, your "wandering eyes," or both, but at least be straight up about it. hang in there buddy. you and me are tight.

dear NANCY
you get very close to me, i mean, you accidentally touched my boob today. do you like me? like that? if so, will you love me forever? do you talk that close to everyone?

dear WAYNE
god I FUCKING LOVE YOU GOD WAYNE

dear DIANNE
fuck girl you scare me. you need to get over those inspection tags, i've never seen anyone get so red in the face. your hair looks nice by the way.

dear JORDAN
pls stop phoning me, and stop glancing at me all the time. you don't want to be involved with a girl like me. you really don't.

dear ANDREW.
they're reeling you in honey. next thing you know, you'll be on the fucking LP committee. run while you can boy, run run run. oh SHIT! YOU ARE ON THE LP COMMMITTEE.

dear JANE,
if there's anything that i really can't stand is when someone doesn't even speak on the P.A., it's a soft whisper that leaves everyone all WTF? all day. REPEAT LAST PAGE PLS, REPEAT LAST PAGE THANK YOU.

thank you,
"the work is over."
-jlc.

6:20 pm - 05.14.04

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