vaneigem's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I WANT TO GO HOME I DONT WANT TO STAY I thought I would write since it has been awhile and it must have been weird having that last entry on there all this time. I'm on a new computer, a mac of all things, and I'm slowly figuring it out. I am burning a smiths cd right now. It is called MEAT IS MURDER. i remember exactly buying this record. I got it in high school and i had no idea who the smiths were. i just thought the record was funny looking and sounding and it must be alright. i dont know how i feel about morrissey as a human being, imnot even sure if i spelt his name right to behonest, but i do know that i like the smiths. it is cheesy emotional stuff which i die over, much like depeche mode. it was probably because i grew up with geoff also. life is okay, what do you say, down by the bay. eat some hay. i started school kind of and im not that enthusiastic about it to be honest. it is a formality. i am not into the bureaucracy of teaching and teachers college is basically ALL bureaucracy in my opinion i mean. i mean, so far. so i dont know i think i am going to focus a lot on music just to get through it. i dont know if i will write a lot about that here. basically registration day was a manual shit show and i got the shittier main class. i sort of applied for this one program partly because i liked the instructor, and it turns out there are two, the second one being this monotonous boring person whose background is math. like what the fuck? whatever. he seems alright. i suppose the solution is to get close to him so i dont get fucking bored out of my mind. i have a great attitude dont i? my parents left to some college, which is fucking fantastic because tehy wait until i start school to fuck off and go somewhere. that is really annoying to me. i love going home but i love the place to myself and when im there they wont leave. i think they do this purposefully, i mean i guess im their daughter and all. whatever. i have a new roommate. its a lot beter to be honest. i dont want to be a big bitch in saying this but living with c. was generally a little gross. at one point she had movie night everynight and id get home and the whole house would be pitch black and her and her friends are couchsurfing watching harry potter. this went on for like aweek straight- harry fucking potter. she also had loads of expired food she never threw out, i dont even want to go any further. she left us an expired toblerone candy bar with her goodbye card. she is a sweet awesome girl just not a good roommate to be honest. tracy is fine, she is neat and that is fine. i want to go to a bunch of shows this year so hopefully that will happen. i dontthink ive been to a single show at all this summer other than the metal one in blvl. i probably have an just cant remember. im really shutting myself in this summer mostly becuase i sometimes feel like shit about myself. i am not really a bummed out kind of person but something looming over me has kept me down in the pits. it was matts bday party last night and it was fucking awesome. gilles got wasted. it was basically a bunch of married couples and then me and nicholas. who i love. tehy are all cool people. the thing was fun. i made a bunch of food for it and it was good fun times. my sister is funny. id basically just like to keep on top of things this year. im trying to think of my goals. i think i am puttinga lot of pressure on myself and it's making me tired. i have worked so hard for so long to get to this year and i think it's freaking me out a little bit, and i'm stressing myself out and making myself really super tired. i have felt really tired all day. that might be beacuse i have been out until 4am wasted on wine and shots but you know. i basically just miss a bunch of people and id like to focus on waht matters in life. i sometimes think about doing really unjamie things like saying fuck off to school and moving to the country and fucking everyone off. well, i put taht a little aggressively but i would do it with a purely peaceful yet nonhippie attitude. i would like to visit kingston soon. who knows. this will be a tough weird year. i would hope that no bullshit happens in my personal life so i can focus on my own professional and creative stuff. tata 11:27 pm - 09.07.08 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||
|
||||||