vaneigem's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Parachute I think we enjoy drama and talking about things in life because it is something that is very immediate. We'd rather deal with our situations than with the past or of our own far-reaching futures. Talking about it makes you relive the past without being redundant or destructive, much like how HenryMiller discusses in black spring about the spider going back and forth over and over to spin its web. It is a soruce of comfort and security to go over persistently. I was not quite heartbroken. I try to avoid talkign about the most dramatic things that occur in my life because it shows that I am trying to relive the past, not something situational, but something which indeed happened a long time ago. I often go to buildings, old sentimental places. I'm not sure why. Maybe because it's comforitng to know they're still there. Maybe because I'd like to see how they've changed. Yet, as I drive by, I just look at it blankly, enjoy it for a moment and walk away and get back to my real life. I only say these things to prepare myself, but I do believe them from the bottom of my heart. Whatever happens from now....... 2:04 am - 08.16.06 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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